is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize