Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
