I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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