talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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