bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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