Non-Jews are for practice
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize