Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
