it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Randomize
