I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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