Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?