And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
