ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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