dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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