i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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