Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??