I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
