she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
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I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
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Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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