we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
