yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I just gargled with NyQuil
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize