it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
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I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
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Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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