Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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