Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
