haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
