Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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