It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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