wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
