big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
