I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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