I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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