apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You dont lie about slip and slides
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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