I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
