DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize