dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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