Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
