My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
