It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
