i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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