hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I cannot find my penis.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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