you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
