now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
