Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize