There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
