Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I had to cum in my sink.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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