32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
