Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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