She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
