hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
