i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
