How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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