yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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